Writers Read

Somewhere along my way as a journalism student I read, "Writers write." And I hear it echoed over and over again in a dark, cobwebbed corner of my mind whenever I start to wonder why I'm still stuck. I feel like I'm literally between a rock and a hard place when I try to picture my life as a writer and too many questions get me questioning what God may have in store for me and the talent He alone has blessed me with:

"Maybe I'm not old enough, not experienced in life enough?"
"Maybe I'm too distracted to really nail this story idea I have bouncing around in my brain like the metal ball in a pinball machine?"
"Maybe once the kids are older I can really focus on this thing?"
"Maybe once I read everything I can get my hands on from CNN crawls to magazine articles to novels, I'll be ready to feel the flow of other writers then uncover my own?"

Maybe this maybe that. Maybe, just maybe, the pinballs bouncing around in my head, because there has been quite an increase in number of balls as of late, could be a sign of things to come. I've had this idea brewing on a low fire for a few years now, but the past week or so has had that idea just boiling...and I'm ready for the next step. But then there's that rock blocking my progress and that hard place keeping me from just giving up. There must be a name for this, writer's insanity maybe, whatever the diagnosis I've got it bad.

Although...reading other writers' work has sparked a flame under my creativity like never before, so I continue to read. I'm reading more literature that coincides with my whacky sense of humor and it amazes me to see there's a place for it in the writing world. It's a huge relief even. But for now, the pinballs must continue their swirling motion in their game board that is my brain because although I know "Writers write", writers must also read...it seems the only way for me to keep pushing at this rock sitting in my way. Reading is how I rock and rock and rock that boulder until one day it rolls away and the pinballs can come together and flow in a way that God intended just for me. Writers read, and so, for now especially, I read.